Feeling Lost? Let’s Talk About Building Real Confidence (Not the Instagram Kind)
I feel you.
You feel lost. Disconnected. Like you’re floating through life instead of actually living it. A shell of a human, some might say (me—I’ve definitely said that).
But what if confidence wasn’t something you were born with, but something you could build—starting today?
Imagine feeling confident in yourself, your decisions, and your ability to craft the life you’ve always dreamt of. Confidence doesn’t just happen—you build it. It stems from self-worth, self-trust, and knowing who the heck you are.
Before you panic—don’t worry. I’m here to help.
In this post, we’ll cover:
Why confidence isn’t just a gimmick
How to find your authentic self and, in turn, your confidence
How feminine energy plays a role in confidence
My top techniques for finding your confidence and coming home to yourself
But First—A Quick Story From Me to You
I’ve been lost. I’ve been confident. I’ve made power moves… only to spiral and think “holy crap, why did I do that?” a few hours later.
I went from being a shell of myself—crippling anxiety, unable to go to the supermarket—to 12 months later hopping on a plane and solo traveling (to India, of all places).
I’ve sat on both sides of the scale. I’ve had unstoppable self-confidence… and I’ve had full-on identity crises, indecisiveness, and that weird gut feeling that I wasn’t really being me—but I wasn’t sure who me even was.
So, let’s get into it. I cannot wait to share this with you.
Why Confidence Isn’t Just a Gimmick
A lot of people (my past self included) think confidence is just a vibe. Something people have that maybe you just… don’t. Or that it’s surface-level—like standing tall, speaking clearly, and pretending you know what you're doing.
Spoiler: it’s not that.
Confidence is deep work. It’s rooted in knowing yourself, liking yourself, and trusting yourself to take the next step—even when it’s scary.
When we go through life without confidence, we seek external validation. We hold ourselves back. And sometimes, we never do the thing we’ve always dreamed of because… what if I fail? What if others judge me?
Most recently, for me, that fear was sharing this very message. I got in my head and held myself back. I don’t know how to edit. What if no one watches? And then I realized—it was my mind trying to keep me small. And here we are.
How to Find Your Authentic Self (and in Turn, Your Confidence)
If you’ve ever looked in the mirror and thought, “I don’t even know who I am anymore”… same.
It’s hard to feel confident when you don’t feel like you. Because confidence? It comes from within.
But here’s the beautiful part: that lost feeling? It’s actually a turning point. Because when you’re done pretending, people-pleasing, and trying to “be” something—you can finally start getting honest.
Confidence comes when you stop trying to be who you think you're supposed to be and start showing up as who you actually are.
I used to come home from social situations feeling completely drained—like I’d been acting for the last few hours. That, to me, was the giveaway: I wasn’t showing up with confidence or authenticity. I was molding myself into someone else’s version of “likable.”
Once I realized that, I had to sit with myself and ask why. The truth? It hurt. My subconscious believed that if I was my true self, people wouldn’t like me. I’d be alone.
That’s when I had to pull out the tools I’m about to share—to identify the pattern and create my way out.
(If you haven’t explored the subconscious mind before, I highly recommend it. It’s wildly powerful once you learn how to make it work for you. You can dive deeper in my free “Mindset Mastery” email course—just click here)
Where Feminine Energy Meets Confidence
You don’t have to hustle your way to confidence. And you definitely don’t have to “man up” to be powerful.
There’s a huge movement happening—women stepping back into their feminine energy and power—and I’m so here for it.
When most people think of confidence, they picture girl boss energy, a suit-wearing CEO, or the bold, loud leader type. But that’s not what I’m talking about here.
I’m talking about soft power. Quiet confidence. That magnetic energy where you just know who you are, what you want, and what you value.
It’s that woman who walks into a room and doesn’t need to say much—her energy says it all.
When you align with your natural rhythm instead of pushing against it, confidence isn’t forced. It’s felt.
My Top Techniques for Finding Your Confidence
So now that we know the type of confidence we’re building, let’s get practical. Here are some of the practices that helped me grow confidence from the inside out:
Daily check-ins: Ask yourself how you're really feeling. Get to know your emotional world. If you’re a little spiritual, start speaking with your inner goddess—ask her what she needs today. It might feel funny at first, but it’s a powerful tool to add to your morning routine.
(Book rec: “The goddess Path” by Kirsty Gallagher)
Mini bravery moments: Do something that scares you just a little every day. You’ll build proof that you can handle it. We simply can’t grow in our comfort zone—so step out of it, just a little, every day.
Inner work journaling: When I feel lost or unclear, journaling brings me home. It helps me pinpoint where I’m at and what I need.
Here’s a quick exercise I use:
Script your dream day—Describe your dream self’s day. What does she wear? How does she move? What are her values? Add as much detail and feeling as you can.
Highlight key themes—In a different color, highlight what your dream self does, feels, and believes. (Bonus: highlight anything she’s let go of too—maybe it’s that 9-to-5 grind.)
Create your action plan—What can you start weaving into your life now? Maybe it’s a simple Pilates class on YouTube or waking up 20 minutes earlier for a morning routine. Some things might take longer—but every big shift starts with small steps.
Show up before you feel ready: Confidence is built through action—not overthinking. Start messy. Start unsure. Just start.
Final Thoughts (and a Little Love Note)
Now my love, I don’t want you to feel overwhelmed.
Confidence isn’t a one-time glow-up. It’s a journey. A process of coming home to yourself, healing your inner world, and learning to lead your life with soft power and self-trust.
This is just the beginning.
Today’s post marks the start of a whole new chapter. I’m diving into all things confidence to support women like you (and past me)—who feel a little lost, but know deep down they’re meant for more.
If that’s you, subscribe below and get weekly confidence-boosting articles sent straight to your inbox. We’re growing together.
Are you ready for even more?
Let me introduce you to…
Self-Worth Rising: The First Step to Feminine Confidence Bundle
By The Exploration Chapter
Self-Worth Rising: The First Step to Feminine Confidence
Self-Worth Rising is a gentle yet powerful foundational bundle designed to help women reconnect with their inner worth, reclaim their voice, and build authentic, lasting confidence from the inside out.
This is for the woman who’s tired of second-guessing herself, shrinking to make others comfortable, or feeling like she’s “too much” and “not enough” all at once.
It’s time to rise.
Inside the bundle, you’ll learn how to:
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✨ Tap into your feminine energy to build confidence with softness and ease
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This isn’t a quick fix — it’s the first step to a lifelong transformation in how you see yourself, treat yourself, and show up in your life.
Inside, you’ll find:
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Your confidence starts from within — and these are the steps that helped me discover the real me, move past the need for external validation, and step into the life-changing power of feminine confidence.
Whether you're just beginning your self-love journey or rebuilding after a setback, this bundle will guide you back home to yourself — where your true power has always been.
